20 December 2011

5 years of pain

Boat ride on the Sea of Galilee

Today marks exactly 5 years since I woke up from a stomach surgery in the extreme pain that has been a constant in my life since Dec. 20, 2006. One fourth of my life I have now spent in this pain. It has been something that I have let define who I am and what I do. But no longer.

I posted while still in Israel about that transformation that happened to my outlook on life while at the Sea of Galilee. That experience has dramatically changed how I view my pain. Over the past five months abroad, and especially in our last month in Israel, the Lord has shown me how much I can do (despite but sometimes because of my pain), as long as I put my trust in Him. This pain no longer has to be a burden, but a tool used by God. It forces me to put my faith in Him day in and day out in order to survive, an extremely humbling new way of life for me. It is still a process, but I know I'm beginning to finally point my life back in the right direction, towards Christ my King and Savior.

Normally on this day of the year I would mope around and think about how depressed I am or how much I think my life sucks, but not this year! I get to go down to Newport to see my best friends and have a giant Christmas Party will all of my Westmont friends that live anywhere near here.

GOD IS SO GOOD!

This is my prayer in the fire
In weakness or trial or pain
There is a faith proved of more worth than gold
So refine me Lord through the flame

I will bring praise, I will bring praise
No weapon formed against me shall remain
I will rejoice, I will declare
God is my victory and He is here

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